Is this the shortest story ever written by the Edmonton Oilers? Quite possibly.
Is this the least researched story ever written by the Edmonton Oilers? Almost certainly.
Will this story result in a third Elmer Ferguson Award for Jason Jarrett? Not likely.
Is it possible to post a properly sized image from a phone? Most definitely!
Plagued by a lack of technology in the front office, the Edmonton Oilers statisticians have resorted to Post-it Notes and graph paper, and it has shown in the team's scouting and boxscores. When general manager Jason Jarrett traded away the franchise's first overall pick in exchange for Vinnie Hinostroza, no one expected the team to go into the tailspin that it did to start the season. Similarly, no on anticipated Hinostroza would be leading or tied for the lead in all significant team offensive statistical categories.
Team snipers Patrik Laine and Zach Parise got off to slow starts, and only now are finding their stride, drawing the team back to within striking distance of a playoff spot in the Western Conference. "A month ago if you'd told me we'd still be in the playoff hunt when ringing in the New Year, I'd have told you to lay off the eggnog, but here we are. But I'd like to make one thing very, very, clear; no one in this locker room is safe, and that includes the coaching staff."
Coach Dave Hakstol, who is entering the final year of a five year contract with Edmonton, has lead the team to the playoffs in two of his previous four seasons, but has been unable to establish any consistency from the team's offense, which is among the league's worst once again this season.
"Winning is the most important thing," said Jarrett, "but tonight we're only worried about one thing; keeping our strikeless streak alive."
Happy New Year from the Edmonton Oilers family!